My journey to getting the love of my life back

Good evening everyone,

I am new to this app/ community and quite “new” to manifestation in general. I say that in quotation marks as I know I’ve ALWAYS been manifesting.

I’ll try and keep this short and sweet (I’m someone who really loves to talk and go into detail lol)

My journey really starts about a month ago, unfortunately, I woke up to a text message from my SP citing things as “My mental health has really deteriorated over this past week and I decided that I can not do a long distance relationship right now.” What followed was a very messy week as you’d imagine, and during that time I also discovered Neville Goddard and a lot of the fundamentals of manifestation.

Quick little bit of context/ backstory:
I live in a beautiful little city along the south coast of England, my SP (fiance) is a lovely lady from California, currently living in Vegas. We met online a while back, and hit things off really quickly! Fast forward a bit, specifically November 7th 2025, I got down on one knee and asked her to marry me. Not only that, she reached into her purse and told me “I was gonna ask you to marry me today!”

Earlier this year, my partner was diagnosed with a tumor in her hand and underwent surgery which unfortunately affected a great deal of mobility in her hand and as a result her mental health declined as well.

Now looking back on all this and doing the self concept work. I realize that I wasn’t the greatest partner. During that time, I was also a heavy drinker (Good news however, I have gone completely sober and also quit smoking)

I also as lying down, listening to videos by Joseph Alai and Athena Raven, I took the time to really think, why do my past relationships all have the same fate? Because it’s something I’ve thought about before and not really dived deep into the root cause of.

And it hit me: I am someone who always needs constant attention, even if I know the other person can’t give it and that will push them away. I am also someone who doesn’t like bringing the past up but will weaponize it in a way and it’s something my SP and I argued about once. As well as many other issues rooted deep inside me. And by identifying those, it really really hit me to the point I was in tears. Not sad tears, but in a way relief, but also feeling really sorry for my SP.

I also put my SP really high up on a pedestal. Viewed her as this person so much better than me, for having a nice apartment, a car (I take the bus to work cause it’s free, but have a drivers license), makes a lot more money than me and just overall viewed her as better than me because of how she would take care of me. I also felt really guilty as I was not able to do all these nice things, or fly out to visit her because I am still a university student doing my Doctorate in which I will graduate as a Doctor next year. And whenever she told me “When are you coming to visit me?” I would in the moment try and think of a way of coming up with the money to go see her without ever living in the end and living in that state of lack.

However, since the split. I have been working mainly on my self concept and realizing “You know what? I’m actually pretty cool,” and I’m grateful for the work I do, for having a roof over my head and food on the table, and for my family and friends who love me for who I am.

I have also worked on the “why do I get these negative thoughts?” Because I used to have them all the time and doubts and all sorts of worries. But by understanding the root cause of them, I no longer feel these things or have these thoughts. I truly am beginning to love my self and realize that I am God, and circumstances do not matter. Anything is possible.

Lastly, something else that really stands out to me now is that everyone truly is you pushed out. My SP and I are actually so alike in how we act, our views, our humor, our past, our goals, our everything. Not just SP, but everyone I meet

I’ve made a lot of progress and have a lot more to make. The next thing I really want to do is figure out how to really shift into that end state. I do have these visualizations of us in bed after our marriage, a time past that end state. But I want to work on how to really feel it and also have a scene I can actually repeat as I’m going to bed. And also during the day, to stop thinking so much about the how because I keep day dreaming about her calling me or what she’ll say, when I know I can get whatever I want. She truly is the love of my life, she’s on my mind non stop. But I also have faith in the universe.

So join me along this journey and I can not wait to share my success story with you all.

Apologies for the long read but thank you to anyone who has read, or has any advice to share, or is joining me in this journey. And a massive thank you to Joseph Alai for showing me this app.

Have a lovely day x